When you just don’t have time for sex

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You know that it’s the first thing to go when things get insane.

Between work, managing your home, maintaining a social life, getting food on the table, and running errands, sex just seems like a nice-to-have rather than a must-have when it comes to scheduling your life.

It’s a common theme that I see over and over again (the other common issue is little to no libido, which we’ll explore soon).

There just isn’t time.

But what happens when you don’t make sex a priority?

It becomes a “should”.

It becomes a burden. Something you feel guilty about, which causes yucky feelings, which leads to frustrating and resentment. Or, it leads to trying to squeeze it in and wishing you’d taken a nap instead.

Sure, you occasionally find time for a fun romp when you have that rare vacation or when one of you decides to play hookie for the day, but that’s just not enough.

I recently explored the reasons people cheat, and feeling unappreciated? Yeah, it’s pretty high up on that list.

Plus, the health benefits for sex are endless – lower blood pressure, reduced anxiety, reduced stress, and it helps with headaches. Not to mention what a great workout it is and the bonding it helps to create with you and your partner(s).

So what do you do when you just don’t have time for sex?

Watch to find out how you can change your mindset and then try this fun and simple technique that’s a favorite among folks I’ve worked with.

[video_embed url=”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzqLOCNMrHM” embed_style=”default” width=”600″]

 

Tweet: Finding time for intimacy is all about creativity & having realistic expectations. http://bit.ly/1BEVXPQ

We make time for the things that are important to us.

I can tell you that my favorite excuse for not exercising is that I just don’t have time. I’m too busy. I’ve got too much going on.

But I magically have time to watch an episode of Game of Thrones. Or to talk to my sister for an hour and a half. Or to take a special trip to that gourmet grocery store that’s a half hour out of the way.

And besides, I could fit a really sweaty, fun workout into 15 or 20 minutes, right?

It’s the same thing for sex.

There’s a saying a friend of mine has about sex: The more you have, the more you want.

It’s easy to forget how fun sex can be when it becomes a burden or an expectation.

But when sex is fun and playful, when you make time for it a few times per week, it actually can become something you not only look forward to, but crave.

And wouldn’t that feel incredible?

What sweet, sexy, or naughty activity could you squeeze in with 15 minutes? Comment below and let’s get a list going that inspires everyone!

[callout title=”Let’s chat” link=”https://www.dawnserra.com/lets-chat/” class=”hb-aligncenter”]If you’re struggling to prioritize sex, then let’s connect. I’m here to help. [/callout]
  • Stacey Herrera

    This is so on point Dawn! We have to make sex a priority… For all the fantastic reasons you listed. Great tips on the video too! I love how you make it so easy, because it can be that easy!

    • Thank you, Stacey!!! You’re so right – it can be that easy when we take a step back and remove ourselves from the should/supposed to/wish mindset that can feel like such a burden.

  • Dawn, this is so true! I’m currently single, but I love that I can take these tips & use them to spice up my friendships & non-romantic relationships. (Plus, it’s always important to take time for sex, even when there isn’t someone to share it with)!

    • Angie, you are so so so right. Solo sex goes out the window when we’re busy and stressed, too. Or any form of self-care. Honestly sex and self-care are closely linked, so often with my clients we’re just working on any kind of self-care and sex comes later. Thanks for stopping by!!!